The Ministries Will Listen
December 14, 2011 § Leave a comment
I can not condone filtering of any sort. We do not condense. We do not abbreviate or dilute the many, many important missives and reports which arrives here at the Ministry at all ticks of the daycycle.
We get every single post as a separate electronic piece of mail.
I make sure to impress on Google how utterly unimportant they are. “Shit on them”, I whisper softly into Google’s brussels-sprout-like little ear, gently stroking its wiry, sparse tufts of hair. “Don’t bother me with this veritable deluge of anguished prayers, entreaties and desperate cries for more supplies and silver bullets from the suffering throngs of that great galactic congregation of SubGenes” (Yes – GalACTIC – am I the ONLY one who ever checks the IP addresses around here? Don’t tell me you still haven’t figured out how.) “Just put them in the folder over there”, I tell Google, dismissively, “and I’ll flip listlessly trough them when I have the time. IF I have the time. Now GO, GO AND DO MY BIDDING”.
It makes me feel like a GOD.